DOCTORS QUOTES

quotations about doctors

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more.

WALTER MATTHAU

Forbes Magazine, 1999


Doctors? Those Muggle nutters that cut people up?

J. K. ROWLING

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix


Tidy fees are the most effective remedy, both for the doctor and the patient.

DARIO FO

Accidental Death of an Anarchist


The most exquisite pleasure in the practice of medicine comes from nudging a layman in the direction of terror, then bringing him back to safety again.

KURT VONNEGUT

God Bless You


Though the doctors treated him, let his blood, and gave him medications to drink, he nevertheless recovered.

LEO TOLSTOY

War and Peace


You can't judge the ability of a doctor by the amount of praise the undertakers give him.

EVAN ESAR

20,000 Quips & Quotes


Surgeons must be very careful
When they take the knife!
Underneath their fine incisions
Stirs the culprit--life!

EMILY DICKINSON

Surgeons must be very careful


Physicians of the Utmost Fame
Were called at once; but when they came
They answered, as they took their Fees,
"There is no Cure for this Disease."

HILAIRE BELLOC

"Henry King, Who Chewed Bits of String, and Was Early Cut off in Dreadful Agonies", Cautionary Tales for Children

Tags: Hilaire Belloc


An apple a day keeps the doctor away. So does not having health insurance.

JOE HICKMAN

attributed, The Mammoth Book of Zingers


To restrict the art of healing to doctors and deny equal privileges to others will constitute the Bastille of medical science. All such laws are un-American and despotic.

BENJAMIN RUSH

Homeopathic World, 1947


The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman.

JONATHAN SWIFT

Polite Conversation


A wealthy doctor who can help a poor man, and will not without a fee, has less sense of humanity than a poor ruffian, who kills a rich man to supply his necessities.

JOSEPH ADDISON

The Tatler, Oct. 8, 1709


Physician, heal thyself.

BIBLE

Luke 4:23


Few people outside medicine realize that what tortures doctors most is uncertainty, rather than the fact they often deal with people who are suffering or who are about to die. It is easy enough to let somebody die if one knows beyond doubt that they cannot be saved -- if one is a decent doctor one will be sympathetic, but the situation is clear. This is life, and we all have to die sooner or later. It is when I do not know for certain whether I can help or not, or should help or not, that things become so difficult.

HENRY MARSH

Do No Harm


I've been poked and prodded in places I'd always prided myself on keeping untouched for that one special doctor who gives me a ring and a promise someday.

LIBBY BRAY

Going Bovine


Where there's a doctor it's always a bad sign. Even when they are not doing the killing themselves it means a death is close, and in that way they are like ravens or crows.

MARGARET ATWOOD

Alias Grace


God heals and the doctor takes the fees.

BENJAMIN FRANKLIN

Poor Richard's Almanack, 1736


Doctors are men who prescribe medicines of which they know little, to cure diseases of which they know less, in human beings of whom they know nothing.

VOLTAIRE

attributed, The Complete Toastmaster: A New Treasury for Speakers


Doctors put a wall up between themselves and their patients; nurses broke it down.

JODI PICOULT

Nineteen Minutes


It's kinda scary when a doctor asks your price range!

TOM WILSON

Ziggy, Mar. 26, 1998