DOUG LARSON QUOTES

American columnist & editor (1926- )

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Look at the Bees

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Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.

DOUG LARSON, Woman's Day Magazine, Apr. 1, 2007

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If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Words from the Wise

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Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Meditations for Living in Balance

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The trouble with learning from experience is that you never graduate.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, The Ship of Thought

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For disappearing acts, it's hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Almanac of the Infamous, the Incredible, and the Ignored

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More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Better Off Wed

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The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.

DOUG LARSON, Reader's Digest, vol. 136

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Sometimes opportunity knocks, but most of the time it sneaks up and then quietly steals away.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Pooped Puppies

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The world is full of people looking for spectacular happiness while they snub contentment.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men

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Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.

DOUG LARSON, Woman's Day Magazine, Aug. 2011

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Autumn is a season followed immediately by looking forward to spring.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Quotable Quotes

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Tags: autumn


Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, opulence is when you have three -- and paradise is when you have none.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Asterisk: The Future of Telephony

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Setting a good example for your children does nothing but increase their embarrassment.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Quotable Quotes: Wit and Wisdom from the Greatest Minds of Our Time

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The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Quotable Quotes

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Law of Airlines: The shorter the time between flights, the greater the distance between gates.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Wise Quotes of Wisdom: A Lifetime Collection of Quotes, Sayings, Philosophies, Viewpoints and Thoughts

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Tags: travel


A pun is the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it yourself.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Great Funny Quotes

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The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Dictionary of Quotations

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Democracy is a system that gives people a chance to elect rascals of their own choice.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Great Sayings and Quotations

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Tags: democracy


Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties.

DOUG LARSON, attributed, Great Funny Quotes

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Tags: duty