quotations about baldness
Is God bald? Some scientists theorize that baldness is an evolutionary development signaling maturity, hence an inclination toward nurturing and a disinclination toward aggression and risk taking. So while baldness might not get you laid, it might get you married.
GLENN O'BRIEN
How To Be a Man: A Guide To Style and Behavior For The Modern Gentleman
Don't tear your hair out over a woman; it'll be harder to attract the next one if you're bald.
EVAN ESAR
20,000 Quips & Quotes
His head was as bald as the palm of my hand; but his hair in falling seemed to have stuck to his chin, and had prospered in the new locality, for his beard hung down to his waist.
JOSEPH CONRAD
Heart of Darkness
It's actually a sex hormone that causes baldness, if that's any consolation, the same relentless secretion that makes one's prostate grow to the size of an orange. Baldness isn't about not enough sexual juice but too much.
GLENN O'BRIEN
How To Be a Man: A Guide To Style and Behavior For The Modern Gentleman
Bald is the new black.
JUSTIN RACZ
50 Bosses Worse Than Yours
He wore baldness like an expensive hat, as if it were out of the question for him to have hair like other men.
GLORIA SWANSON
on first meeting Cecil B. DeMille, Bedside Book of Celebrity Gossip
A bald head is no disgrace if the baldness is confined to the outside.
JACOB MORTON BRAUDE
Speaker's Desk Book of Quips, Quotes & Anecdotes
You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald spot.
ELAYNE BOOSLER
attributed, Women Know Everything!
Experience is a comb which nature gives to men when they are bald.
JACOB MORTON BRAUDE
Speaker's Desk Book of Quips, Quotes & Anecdotes
Baldness doth witness a choleric complexion, which is hot and dry; and choleric men are naturally deceitful ... and therefore it followeth, "a primo ad ultimum" that bald men are deceitful and crafty.
ARISTOTLE
The Works of Aristotle
Balding is a marker of sexual maturity in humans and some other primates, and although it appears later than some other changes in post-pubertal hair growth it may still develop early enough to influence mating behavior. There is some evidence that balding men have slightly higher androgen levels than non-bald men. Whether this translates into greater reproductive success is unknown and difficult to verify, but it is perhaps the most likely explanation for the survival of balding genes into modern man.
ULRIKE BLUME-PEYTAVI
Hair Growth and Disorders
Place your hat cockeyed upon your balding head
Oh, and dance a little dance to celebrate
THEE MORE SHALLOWS
"Cloisterphobia"
Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man - there's your diamond in the rough.
LARRY DAVID
attributed, Jewish Comedy Stars
Bald men are enjoying a resurgence in appeal and popularity that they probably haven't known since Curly Neal of Harlem Globetrotters fame astounded opponents and audiences with his on-court hi-jinks or Isaac Hayes dazzled the musical world with his soulful sounds. NBA superstars Michael Jordan of the Chicago Bulls and Charles Barkley of the Phoenix Suns are two of the trendsetters in the NBA with their clean-cut domes. Many women polled agreed that the shaven scalp not only provides a clean-cut, well-groomed image, it's downright macho, simply sexy to bare it all.
SYLVIA P. FLANAGAN
Jet Magazine, Sep. 6, 1993
Getting away with going bald is an important life skill for men.
ANONYMOUS
Getting Away with It: Short Cuts to the Things You Don't Really Deserve
The most delightful advantage to being bald--one can hear snowflakes.
R.G. DANIELS
attributed, Uncle John's Bathroom Reader
There's one thing about baldness; it's neat.
DON HEROLD
attributed, The Concise Columbia Dictionary of Quotations
Bald as the bare mountain tops are bald, with a baldness full of grandeur.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Essays in Criticism
The tenderest spot in a man's makeup us sometimes the bald spot on the top of his head.
HELEN ROWLAND
attributed, Women Know Everything!
A few locks of dry white hair clung to his scalp, like wild flowers fighting for life on a bare rock.
RAYMOND CHANDLER
The Big Sleep