DIVORCE QUOTES V

quotations about divorce

So many persons think divorce a panacea for every ill, who find out, when they try it, that the remedy is worse than the disease.

DOROTHY DIX

Her Book


I try not to think of divorce as failing at marriage but rather winning at bitterness and resentment.

ANONYMOUS


Marriage is grand. Divorce is about twenty grand.

JAY LENO

The Tonight Show


Take my last wife. We get on like a house on fire. Last week she took me out to a splendid dinner, she buys me presents, calls me 'old bean' and even phones the Coach and Horses to see whether I've snuffed it or not. But final and damning proof of the failure of our divorce is that she still laughs at my jokes. I wouldn't swap her for a wife.

JEFFREY BERNARD

Low Life: Irreverent Reflections from the Bottom of a Glass

Tags: Jeffrey Bernard


Divorce is like death without a burial.

DANE CUNNINGHAM

Risky Relationships


You know why divorces are so expensive? Because they're worth it.

HENNY YOUNGMAN

stand-up routine


Divorce is probably of nearly the same date as marriage. I believe, however, that marriage is some weeks the more ancient.

VOLTAIRE

Philosophical Dictionary


Divorce is the price people play for playing with matches.

EVAN ESAR

20,000 Quips & Quotes


Our D-I-V-O-R-C-E becomes final today
Me and little J-O-E will be goin' away
I love you both and it will be pure H-E double L for me
Oh, I wish that we could stop this D-I-V-O-R-C-E

TAMMY WYNETTE

"D-I-V-O-R-C-E"


Heartbreak is a loss. Divorce is a piece of paper.

TAYLOR JENKINS REID

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo


In our family we don't divorce our men -- we bury them.

RUTH GORDON

Lord Love a Duck


This divorce you're asking me to give you
I don't want to see it go through
This divorce will make you free and happy
But it will leave me lonely and blue.
I believe what God has brought together
Let no man put apart in the force
I believe that someday you'll be sorry
That you've asked me for this divorce.

KITTY WELLS

"This Divorce", Burning Memories


Divorce is a declaration of independence with only two signers.

GERALD F. LIEBERMAN

attributed, Divorce: It's All About Control


Divorce is always good news. I know that sounds weird, but it's true because no good marriage has ever ended in divorce. That would be sad. If two people were married and ... they just had a great thing and then they got divorced, that would be really sad. But that has happened zero times.

LOUIS C.K.

"The Annotated Wisdom of Louis C.K.", Splitsider


Love, the quest; marriage, the conquest; divorce, the inquest.

HELEN ROWLAND

A Guide to Men


A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, any more than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

JEAN KERR

Mary, Mary


I doubt if there is one married person on Earth who can be objective about divorce. It is always a threat, admittedly or not, and such a dire threat that it is almost a dirty word.

NORA JOHNSON

attributed, Women Know Everything!


Many a woman would get a divorce if she could do it without making her husband happy.

EVAN ESAR

20,000 Quips & Quotes